A month ago, with the help of Remy-nii, Rin-san and Rai-san I had started a project aimed to provide some sort of an outlet to people who are hurting. I had mentioned in the original post that I would be also adding monthly posts on the same, with some simple suggestions to help.
This post has honestly been long due, and I apologise for the delay, I hadn’t quite figured how to go about this when I started writing.
It’s like a Sine graph
Things get out of hand quickly and often. Some days, you’re perfectly fine with that. Other days, your feelings about them may be more drastic.
If you’re a Math student (or were),you’d understand me when the perfect parallel I’d draw to moods is the sine graph.
While it may sound like I’m joking, it really gets annoying. When you’re down in the “dumps”, the first thing you find faults with is yourself.
Why am I so useless?
I can’t believe people like me.
I hate myself.
It may feel right at the moment. It may even provide a strange sort of comfort. But these feelings only add to the burden you’re already carrying.
So then, what should you be thinking?
Ask yourself some questions. Be it something like What am I scared of? or What can comfort me now? , remember to ask yourself. Most times you’ll draw a blank. An I don’t know.
And that’s a good answer. This isn’t an exam where “I don’t know” equals “fail”. It isn’t a relation where “I don’t know” equals “trouble”.
It’s a situation where “I don’t know” equals “A chance”.
No problem is a small problem
Recently, Synne-chan who kindly shared my post had wrote something that I found very true and very apt.
Someone who drowns in 7 feet of water is just as dead as someone who drowns in 20.
Just because there’s definitely someone who’s in more trouble than you are, you needn’t not talk about it.
While that fact, that you are not yet at the worst, could give you hope, it shouldn’t confine you.
I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again. It needn’t be something big. Anxious about an upcoming match or so mad about someone saying something or doing something all account for a chance to talk about it.
The First thing to get a person to open up to you is to open up to them yourself
Sometime back someone I knew said to me, “Hey your best friend not there today?”
And even before, “You probably won’t like it.”
They’re two different circumstances and two different scenarios but my first response was the same to both.
“She’s not my best friend. Don’t assume stuff. What do you know about me anyway?”
“How do you know? You don’t know anything about me anyway.”
Then my second realisation was that they didn’t know, because I didn’t let them.
If you get upset by someone because they said something against what you are, ask yourself this, “Did I let them know anything about me?”
And more importantly why didn’t you?
But for now, let’s leave it at that and move on to other things as promised.
Simple things to do to cool down
- Create a safe place
It needn’t be a real place. It could be a mental situation you imagine to get back to normal, or a particular activity you do to settle down.
I imagine the clicking of my house door lock to calm myself down and the short bicycle ride between school and home always grounds me.
- Revisit things that comforted you
It could be a snack you ate when you were young, or a smell you associated with happiness (like vanilla or oranges) or even something like a particular way you sat before.
Things like these remind you of who you’d be missing if you did something drastic and all the more why not to.
- Remind yourself of what you can be
This may sound mainstream and useless, but it works. Remind yourself of what you can be and how you can change if you really want to.
Because it’s fine if you don’t know who you are, if you know who or how you want to be.
Hearing it from someone else
Art-san’s anxiety posts were a great read and I feel that it must be read by everyone more so as a part of #ContinueDontQuit.
- My story
- Panic Attacks
- High Level of Anxiety Tips
- Medium Level of Anxiety Tips
- Low Level of Anxiety Tips
March’s #ContinueDontQuit Golden Tip
Yes, that’s right. Newspaper doodling. It may sound stupid at the moment, but when things are really heavy and you can’t think, pick up a marker, take a newspaper and start scribbling. Mustaches, beards, glasses, horns or scars, childish as it may sound, mauling some poor dude’s face clears a bad mood like none other.
So this month’s tip is to draw and doodle on newspapers until you feel lighter.
And if you’re up to it, click a picture and tweet it with #ContinueDon’tQuit. I’ll be extremely grateful for the share.
After all, silly stuff help when nothing else can.
Once again, you can contact me
Remember, Continue Don’t Quit.